"Oh, honey, look at this, isn't it neat?"
"Do you know what it is?"
"Yes, an ironing board that installs in the wall. I didn't say I'd use it, I said it was neat."

Happy Birthday you know who in NH!

(I didn't know the exact day sorry, but I usually celebrate birthday week!)

Just when you think it's safe, winter comes along and hits you in the face again.

This is for the Northerners


Honk if you heard the geese!

"No I don't think I have enough books. There is still space on the floor over there."

At the book club meeting anyone of them could have said it. "Oh you mean we were actually supposed to read the book, I thought that was code for let's have coffee."

Is it ever going to be warm again?

Ray: Now that I know your OK, Is it OK to laugh?
Me: #@%*!#@%*!

It makes me wonder what I usually look like when someone says, "Oh my god, you look so good!"
Apparently they're pretty shocked that I can look good.

Things I wish I would have said when I was a waitress:

Me: Hi, can I get you something to drink?
Customer: No thanks, I'll just have water.
Me: Oh, so you'll be bathing in that instead of drinking it?

For the record:
Partial nudity at a sporting event: NOT ACCEPTABLE.
Partial nudity in a sports magazine: A TRADITION.

Sorry--very tired--needed time off.

Happy 14th Birthday Kelci and Michelle!

Michelle(left) and Kelci
M: You do realize that since you cut your hair we'll NEVER be discovered. They want identical twins.
K: Yea, but the good part is no one will think I'm you anymore.

Sorry girls it's not the hair that makes you look alike!

Knowing full well what would happen, she poked it anyway. She just couldn't help herself.

"I think I'll sit and stare at this window
from now on, it never brings me rejection
letters."

"What do you mean the world didn't come
to an end yesterday because I took the
afternoon off!
Did it at least tilt a little?"

Sick Days Suck

"I can't be sick, I have too much to do. I have
work, writing and the house to clean. Who's
going to do all this? I am not sick! Did
Wonder Woman ever get a day off?"